I was right about the pain in the neck.
And Maddy's going around bullying people about pain in the ear. And what with people having been spotted in Hyderabad, methinks western naval commander is also suffering though he doesn't show it.

Asterix and Obelix speaking in Hindi made them even more hilarious in Asterix and Obelix: The Cleopatra Mission. Anyone planning to see it don't miss Otis and Cleopatra's Mona Lisa pose.
Speaking of poses, when someone announced, "Get ready for the Kingfisher babe calendar 2006," many guys jumped in excitement in the canteen. Literally jumped onto tables. But waxed men in bikinis and shorts fluttering their eyelashes got more catcalls from the babes. I really would like that calendar on my desk. RMD please take note. Even Jaaved Jaffrey was all for the badminton babe. "I the likes," he said and later shyly tried saying hi but then slunk away from the newsroom as Jackie Shroff obliged senior sub for a pic (who had an unbelievable grin on his face) and tried shooting me.

No, I haven't changed my mind about facial hair but here's something that may explain it.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/23/fashion/thursdaystyles/23BEARDS.html?8hpib

and if the article goes into Times Select, here's the highlights.

"It's a sign of the times," said Mr Martin, the advertising director for Vice, a lad magazine based in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. "People are into beards right now."

This is some sort of reaction to men who look scrubbed, shaved, plucked and waxed," said the designer Bryan Bradley, who stepped onto the runway after his Tuleh presentation looking like a renegade from the John Bartlett show, at which more than half the models wore beards: untidy ones that scaled a spectrum from wiry to ratty to shabby to fully bushy.
"It's less 'little boy,' " Mr Bradley said. "For a while men have looked too much like Boy Scouts going off to day camp."

Yet the return of the wild beard carries a certain erotic charge that has been missing from beards since the Furry Freak look of the 1970's, or at least those who grow them hope they do.

"You know, it's funny," said Lola Phonpadith, a public relations manager for the fashion company BCBG. "I've been talking about this with my friends for weeks. I'm kind of into guys with beards today, and I'm embarrassed to say that. But the pretty-boy look can only last for so long."

Aargh.

I'm taking a poll. How many people want to read about the news editor? If people don't mind I'm going to knock out his character. I know he pushes up the temperature around and has a colourful demeanour what with his coffee and somebody's crackers, but he's getting a bit predictable.
Unlike the skits at the talent contest. Charkha Dutt spoke to Hanuman while plenty of people felt the news. Though someone predictably missed his flight.
And I think we need some ice in the coffee.

Did I say stubble not good? That should be stubble not bad at all. Since the news editor is hogging all coffee avenues, the power up there decided to shift the action to the staircase. It seemed like a long encounter would have been nice but, well.
Meanwhile, talent continued to be unearthed after the tenor unleashed some unchained melodies yesterday (the judges weren't too bad either) and today the news editor had the same grin as I had when he returned from the sixth floor. Hope it wasn't for the same reason as mine.
The western naval commander too was grinning from ear to ear. Apparently it had something to do with a 2-hour rendezvous and a red salwar kameez.
Oh and I have been told that all things Bong are nice.

Ok, stubble not good. But it's better than a goatee. Anytime better. And anyway, not like I'm gonna have any stubble trouble.
And with all the news editor's wiles and bullying, the coffee machine scored a small, little victory thanks to its 'soothing' properties. So why did coffee man offer that explanation to news editor? I prefer to think of it as a polite explanation and a no thank you to an underlying invitation from the news editor waiting with his better coffee cup in hand.

Someone has suggested that we rescue the coffee man. Ya, I can so see that. "Pssst, do you need rescuing?" we shall ask in a loud whisper even as the news editor leads him away, far away from the coffee machine to his own little khopcha. But even if he might appreciate the rescue, I have reason to believe that it is already too late. Ipod thought a lot about whether he should smile or not but the boss kept away. Looks like the news editor has just scared him off.
Meanwhile, news of a rich father-in-law put Maddy further in the dumps. And the desk has a few questions for the executive daddy at the next party. If anyone wants any questions answered, (senior sub, we already have your comp off question listed) feel free to leave them here. We shall try our best.

The news editor just heard that his Indonesian girlfriend got married. Ok, he must be heartbroken and all but does that mean he should hit on the coffee man big time despite the fact that he was clearly not looking his best today (from what I hear from Maddy). I tried explaining to Maddy that people who wear lenses usually have really really ancient, unfashionable glasses. I haven't seen with my lenses-draped own eyes but Maddy has been talking of her heart sinking. Despite that, despite that, the news editor took coffee man someplace else for 'good' coffee. If this isn't trying to bugger up the coffee machine's chances then what is?

Meanwhile, I just had a thought. The coffee man has become a pain in the neck.

Wake up and smell the coffee.
The caffeine insanity reached its peak__after pages. People are working hard and needed a cuppa at 11.10. Mocha conversation included ads and editorial timings. Everyone says they didn't hear a thing and are calling themselves the three monkeys. Ya right. Am sure he heard the news editor's booming voice though he just happened to look what with eyes crossing and all that.
Anyway, joy to the world, and news editor I even forgive you.

Between 4.30 and 7.30, between coffee and crackers, we've got the whole gamut of insanity covered. As Maddy reminds me, it's going to be Monday before I can get any more coffee (the news editor has no shame, says he's in competition). She on the other hand, is going to crackle, snap and pop with crackers all over the weekend. It's an unfair world.

Maddy can never be a lunching lady. I, on the other hand, was born to lunch. (Though no thank you to Mrs Thadani). Moronic waiter at Gallops thought we wanted virgin coladas. I mean, really. Was sleepy as hell for a bit and the coffee machine beckoned but a conversation about coffee walas was enough to wake us up. The men turned a crazy shade of green and the coffee wala scrammed. It would scare anyone, that shade.
Later, the boss said he wasn't stupid to have ordered cake for us all but his face said it all... it really wasn't as discreet as the Valentine operation.

Strange things are happening.
This power that catches on to what's on my mind only manages to get half the story. So, people go on shaving sprees but that's the end. I think Maddy can forget about giving anyone an earful too.
Meanwhile, the bi-strangeness also continues. Or maybe it's Oscar fever. Another two men in the office (married) have declared 'timeless love' for each other. The senior assistant editor has promised to kill the designer after he makes all his pages (or was that 14 babies) and then make a Taj Mahal in his memory.

Today we got stoned. But that had nothing to do with why I proposed to this guy twice. His first response was "Eh? sorry?". No, I didn't say eggjactly. And no, my proposal had nothing to do with the fact that he said he has seven cars and a huge house in Golf Links. The second time, however, it had everything to do with that garden in the front and back. But all he said was "Pagal."
Koi nahi. We've set a detective to check out Mr iPod. We even have ice-breaking strategies ready--Maddy going to give him an earful.